8 exercises to develop your emotional intelligence and be a better leader

Emotional intelligence is fundamental to being a successful leader. Emotional intelligence is much more important than cognitive intelligence. And the good thing is that you can train.

These exercises will allow you to develop your emotional intelligence and become a better leader.

Exercises for developing self-awareness

1. Reflect on how you feel right now

To know what you feel you need to take the time to understand and reflect on it. We almost never do this.

An easy way to do it is to write it naming the emotion, if not at the same moment, later, trying to recover it. Do I feel anger, joy, sadness, agitation, etc.? If you can not find the word for that emotion, put a name that you can think of and define it in some way that makes sense to you.

For you want to go a little further, try to describe the emotion using a metaphor.

2. Make a list of your daily emotions

Based on the previous exercise that focuses on the now, it is useful, too, to take a little more time and reflect on what you have felt throughout the day to get to know yourself better.

At night, he writes a diary of emotions. Divide each page into two columns: the one on the left is to list your emotions, the one on the right is to describe the context in which that emotion has arisen.

Once you have listed all the emotions, analyze them and compare them. What is the proportion of positive and negative emotions during the day? What emotions dominate and what causes them? What are its triggers?

This will allow you to see where the emotions come from to work on changing the triggers and reduce negative emotions by preventing them from arising.

Exercises for self-management

3. Breathe

This is a great exercise because in our busy daily life we ​​simply do not breathe enough.

Especially when you are under stress, step back, close your eyes and breathe for a few moments. Feel the breath. This will allow you to relax and not react immediately. Once you are calm, you can think clearly.

4. Count up to 10 in stressful situations

Adding to the previous exercise, when you are under stress: go back one step, breathe and count to ten. The best way to do it is to breathe slowly and say “one” while exhaling, then repeat until you reach 10.

Another trick is to take a sip of water before acting.

5. Reframe the situation

Each individual perceives things differently. What is good or bad for me may not be good for you.

Changing our views, especially when we are stressed or angry, can be a powerful tool to better manage your emotions.

There are two different types of reframings you can do in such situations:

Your mind has a choice to decide how it perceives reality and you can train it for it.

Social awareness and relationship management exercises

6. Observe for 15 minutes

We are stuck in our own world, so much so that we do not realize what is happening around us. And we can really learn a lot from it.

When you are in the office, observe what is happening around you: how people walk and talk to others and who they talk to; What are your moods? How are your desks arranged? What they feel? What is the general mood of the group? What do you see and hear? Do this once a day, for 15 minutes.

This is not vigilance, it’s learning about the people around you.

7. Explain your decisions, do not just take them

This is especially important in the corporate world. Some leaders simply expect to decide something and everyone will buy it. It is not that easy.

It is not just about making a decision and expecting everyone to follow it, but about explaining the reason for the decision. That is even more important when the decision itself implies a change that must happen or is already happening. People not only accept things, they need to hear what the options were, why, how a particular option was chosen and how it will affect everyone.

This also applies to your personal life with your partner, children or friends.

8. Deal with difficult conversations

Nobody likes confrontations or arguments, but they are inevitable if we want to move forward.

There is a formula to better deal with such situations:

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